The Outline

Casey Johnston

Casey Johnston
The Future Jun 18

What I wouldn’t do for a good night’s sleep

The CBD backlash has already begun, but at least one product aimed at aspirational sleepers is attempting to answer those doubts.

The Future Jun 12

We should turn tech against the people who make it

A deepfake video of Mark Zuckerberg gleefully talking about the data he “stole” puts Facebook’s sanctimonious approach to moderation to the test.

The Future Jun 03

Why would anyone trust Apple with their data?

Every tech company has failed to protect us. Now Apple wants a shot.

The Future May 14

I’m Upset: “Eating healthy” is too much work

I have experienced the benefits of healthy eating and I cannot believe I must keep this up for the rest of my life.

The Future May 08

Is $1,300 the price I can put on happiness?

That’s how much it costs to purchase a Bird scooter that could be stolen at any moment.

The Future May 06

Forget AirPods: Buy the cheapest Bluetooth earbuds you can find

AirPods die fast, and so do all the headphones like them. Trust no Bluetooth earbud.

The Future May 01

Facebook is trying to make the word “private” meaningless

The company doesn't need to read your messages to keep collecting data about you.

Culture Apr 29

Holzhauer may have proved everyone has been playing Jeopardy backwards

Starting with the $1,000-2,000 clue doesn’t just get quick money; it helps lock in the more valuable $200-800 clues. Stay with me.

The Future Apr 25

Watching this chimp use Instagram like a bored teen makes me feel bad

There is something so sinister about how chimps and babies know how to use iPhones, and even the World Health Organization feels it.

The Future Apr 18

Apple owes everyone an apology and it should start with me, specifically

Its butterfly keyboard design has failed, but Apple has yet to substantially admit that it has made a very big mistake.

The Future Apr 15

The worst weather is wind

You might think it’s other weather. You would be wrong.

The Future Mar 27

Wow, what a revelation to have a representative give a shit about climate change

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s holding conservatives to account over their snide attitude toward climate change is the only way forward.

The Future Mar 12

Rich parents are Photoshopping their disappointing kids

Dozens of parents, college faculty and staff, and co-conspirators have been indicted for faking their kids’ way through the admissions process.

Culture Feb 14

The Rock has made a new sport. Thank you, The Rock

‘The Titan Games,’ The Rock’s new physical-feat competition show on NBC, demonstrates to me how badly the world is in need of new sports.

The Future Jan 29

How long could my murderer pretend to be me online?

A crime drama TV show raises some questions for me personally about the way we live alone.

The Future Jan 22

Why is my Gmail suddenly full?

And why do I have to pay to make this problem go away?

The Future Jan 10

Manchester WeWorkers are pissed they can’t get pissed for free anymore

Notes from the edge of our permalance coworking future.

Culture Dec 26

Welcome to the walled garden, we’ve got phones and games

In July, Apple was on its way to becoming the first U.S. company worth a trillion dollars by betting on a system everyone said would keep it small.

The Future Nov 26

Please leave me alone about the Instant Pot

I’m sure you love yours. Well I’m not really, but nonetheless

The Future Nov 15

The site pushing Facebook’s pet causes sure is doing well on Facebook

Interesting.

The Future Nov 12

You have to work out now, I’m sorry I don’t make the rules

In particular, adults have to lift weights or do resistance training twice a week /chugs protein shake

The Future Nov 06

Are you a good person who works in tech? Walk out

The government is useless and there is not a feasible way for two billion people to extricate themselves from Facebook. You know who has bargaining power? Workers.

Culture Oct 31

I need TV that lets me fall asleep

Not prestige drama, not mindless reality, but something somewhere in the middle.

The Future Oct 30

Skipping your flu shot is selfish

Even if you’re not at risk of dying, you can still get other people sick.

The Future Oct 23

Crowdfunding funneled $6.8 million to unsupported medical treatments

Patients are targeted by doctors who offer relief with procedures that are not backed up by research, and even dangerous, if only they can locate the funds outside of their insurance.

The Future Oct 22

See how grotesque Jeff Bezos’ fortune is in this choose-your-own-adventure game

‘You Are Jeff Bezos’ is a game that illustrates in detail the truly appalling amount of wealth people are allowed to amass and then just keep to themselves.

The Future Oct 18

MoviePass, which never made sense, is under investigation

The New York State attorney general has opened a probe into MoviePass’s parent company to see whether it misled investors. I don’t know, maybe?

The Future Oct 15

The new and improved MacBook keyboards have the same old problems

Many users continue to report stuck keys; maybe it’s time for other companies to stop looking to Apple for design cues.

The Future Oct 11

Kanye West, change your phone passcode right this second

000000??????

The Future Oct 10

Yeet me to the moonmoon

Moons can have moons, and climate change deniers have this planet, and I wish we could get out of here.

The Future Oct 08

It’s not in anyone’s interest to admit whether China hacked us

‘Bloomberg Businessweek’ reported mass surveillance by the Chinese army, and everyone, including Apple and Amazon, denies it. What else would anyone do?

The Future Oct 02

If men had to get IUDs, they’d get epidurals and a hospital stay

Insertions of the best method of birth control can be blindingly painful during and after, but all women get is a single over-the-counter painkiller. Why?

Culture Sep 27

Here is a 10-minute loop of Lady Gaga belting the best part of the A Star Is Born song

We’re far from the shallow now.

The Future Sep 26

Even the people who profited the most from Facebook hate Facebook

The founders of Instagram quit, and the founders of WhatsApp regret selling, and Facebook’s greed is at the root of it all.

The Future Sep 12

Apple can delete purchased movies from your library without telling you

Turns out cloud storage is not all it’s cracked up to be.

The Future Sep 11

How to not get raped on a Tinder date, according to the app’s CEO

The new HBO documentary “Swiped” has some useful tips for women.

The Future Sep 07

Info Spiral: What are the teens doing?

A difficult-to-follow story, in convenient capsule form.

By Casey Johnston

The Future Aug 24

Healthy versions of your favorite candy are coming, and they are abominations

If you take out the sugar and add fiber and make it guiltless, is it still a treat?

The Future Aug 23

Did my two friends save each other from getting struck by lightning?

An investigation.
By Casey Johnston

The Future Aug 20

The self-driving car that will never arrive

Self-driving cars are delusional tech optimism rooted in greed, sorry

The Future Aug 17

How small women’s pockets are, visualized

Why do brands hate women?

The Future Aug 07

If you tweet like a bot you should still get banned

“Being too online” gets a bot deleted, and real people need that smackdown, too.

The Future Jul 27

Twitter needs an “undo” button

Editing tweets is too much, but we need to create some space for self-reflection in this content tornado.

The Future Jul 20

The online status indicator is dead

Instagram: stop snitching.

The Future Jul 18

Only by 4 a.m., when it cools down, can we sleep.

South Asian cities are already feeling the effects of our climate-changed world.

The Future Jul 12

Science says get out of your dead-end relationship

People (and mice, and rats) over-value sunk costs in their decision-making processes. Time for us to value the future more.

The Future Jul 10

Everyone’s favorite houseplant only wants to die

Is your pothos here for any of this? An investigation.

By Casey Johnston

The Future Jun 22

Apple admits its computers are broken

Eight months after a surge of complaints, Apple announced a repair program for its flawed MacBooks and MacBook Pros.

The Future Jun 22

I recommend a Wi-Fi plug for your air conditioner

Mostly the future is bad but sometimes it’s cool.

The Future Jun 11

“Revolutionary” gene editing tool may increase cancer risk

Two new studies find CRISPR may have unintended side effects.

The Future Jun 04

Apple’s new product features are an admission of guilt

The company knows your addiction to its devices is making you miserable.

The Future May 12

Apple knew its computers were “defective,” sold them anyway, suit alleges

A class action suit has been filed against Apple over the keyboards in its laptops.

The Future May 11

How much we love fake news, visualized

Of course, this post being true, it will do no traffic. No matter; I will die poor and right.

The Future May 10

A no-bullshit guide to Google I/O 2018

We give you the good, the bad, and the ugly from Google's developer conference.

The Future May 08

I’m excited to outsource every difficult conversation to my Google Assistant

Google’s natural-sounding AI will make all your appointments, and so much more.

The Future Apr 30

Facebook could make a separate Fake News Feed if it felt like it

It just doesn’t want to.

The Future Apr 30

Which Condé Nast brands does Apple allegedly want to buy?

If Apple becomes a publisher, maybe it will finally be cool again.

The Future Apr 25

Don’t buy the MacBook Pros even on sale, in my opinion

I sold mine back to Apple. Yes, that bad.

The Future Apr 23

Here is how a penis transplant works

Surgeons have completed the first “total penis and scrotum transplant.”

The Future Apr 19

If you just message “hi” and nothing else I assume I’m getting fired

My boss is trying to give me a heart attack.

The Future Apr 16

The Impossible burger makes a fine bad burger

It will easily replace meat as an ingredient, but not meat itself.

The Future Apr 06

Where is your data? Who knows

Data doesn’t get tracked, so once it’s off Facebook, honestly who knows where it gone.

The Future Apr 02

Social media needs more awkward silences

Facebook needs to learn to read the room.

The Future Mar 26

Boxed mac and cheese: now with protein

Foods are seizing a cultural moment, and Ancient Harvest POW! White Cheddar Shells is one of them.

The Future Mar 26

I, too, think Snapchat is over, personally

Truly an accomplishment in this day and age to burn out rather than fade away.

The Future Mar 19

Cambridge Analytica’s leak shouldn’t surprise you, but it should scare you

Facebook is not alone in making everyone’s data available for whatever purpose.

The Future Mar 14

World Dispatch: Behind every strong female film character is Junkie XL

This Dutch composer has created the themes for characters including Wonder Woman, Furiosa from ‘Mad Max’, and Lara Croft of ‘Tomb Raider.’ He spoke with us on today’s Outline World Dispatch.

The Future Mar 12

The Tinder struggle, visualized

One Reddit user created a graphic to show how many matches actually turned into dates.

The Future Mar 06

Drone discovers 1.5 million penguins chilling on a few tiny islands

Nice eye, drone.

The Future Feb 14

Tinder is not actually for meeting anyone

We’ve done the math on Tinder… and it doesn’t look good

The Future Oct 17

The new MacBook keyboard is ruining my life

It’s so bad